Highly Sensitive Resources to help you help your child
Parenting is a journey filled with surprises, but nothing could have prepared me for what I encountered when my first child was born. He turned everything I thought I knew about parenting upside down. The sleepless nights, the meltdowns over what seemed like the tiniest things, the overwhelming emotions—it had me questioning so many things, including my own sanity.
For a while, I wondered if I was doing something wrong. Why did he react so strongly to seemingly minor experiences? Why did loud noises, bright lights, or changes in routine send him into a tailspin? The parenting books I had read didn't quite fit what I was experiencing. Then, I stumbled upon the concept of the Highly Sensitive Child temperament, and everything started to click.
As I took a deep dive into the world of high sensitivity, I realized that not only was my child highly sensitive, but so was I. It was a revelation that changed everything. Suddenly, I had a framework to understand his needs and my own. This wasn’t about being overly emotional or fragile; it was about a unique nervous system that processes the world more deeply.
This adventure has been anything but dull. It has been filled with tears, joy, frustration, deep learning, and, most importantly, connection. Understanding high sensitivity has allowed me to create a more supportive environment for my child, and in turn, it has made the journey of parenting much easier (or at least more understandable!).
What Is a Highly Sensitive Child?
Highly sensitive children (HSCs) make up about 15-20% of the population and have a more finely tuned nervous system. This means they process stimuli—sounds, sights, emotions, and social interactions—on a much deeper level. Some common traits include:
Heightened Sensory Awareness – They may be overwhelmed by loud noises, bright lights, strong smells, or certain textures.
Deep Emotional Responses – They experience emotions intensely, from overwhelming joy to deep sadness or frustration.
Strong Empathy – They often pick up on the emotions of others, sometimes even before those emotions are fully expressed.
Need for Downtime – After a stimulating experience, they need time to decompress.
Detail-Oriented Thinking – They notice things others may not and often ask profound or philosophical questions.
Highly Sensitive Child, Autism, and Neurodiversity – Understanding the Spectrum
Many people wonder how being a Highly Sensitive Child differs from autism, and whether someone can be both. Additionally, some ask how high sensitivity fits within the broader neurodiversity movement. The answer is yes, they are distinct but overlapping traits, and in our case, we eventually came to understand that we are both highly sensitive and autistic.
Some key differences between high sensitivity and autism include:
Social Differences – Highly sensitive children are typically deeply empathetic and attuned to social nuances, whereas autistic children may struggle with social communication, reading social cues, or understanding unwritten social rules.
Sensory Processing – Both HSCs and autistic individuals can have sensory sensitivities, but in autism, sensory processing differences can be more extreme or inconsistent (seeking certain stimuli while avoiding others).
Repetitive Behaviors & Special Interests – Autistic children often engage in repetitive behaviors (stimming) and develop intense special interests, which are not core traits of high sensitivity.
Cognitive Processing Differences – Autism is a neurodevelopmental condition that affects communication, executive function, and cognitive processing in specific ways, whereas high sensitivity is more about heightened emotional and sensory processing without cognitive or developmental differences.
For us, understanding that we are both highly sensitive and autistic was a game changer. Recognizing high sensitivity as part of natural brain diversity—similar to autism, ADHD, and other neurodivergent traits—helped us embrace both our strengths and challenges. While high sensitivity is not classified as a neurodevelopmental condition like autism, it is increasingly recognized as an important part of the neurodiversity conversation, as it shapes how individuals experience and interact with the world. It helped us embrace both our strengths and challenges with more clarity. If you’re wondering whether your child may be highly sensitive, autistic, or both, consider seeking a professional evaluation to gain deeper insights.
Challenges of Raising a Highly Sensitive Child
While high sensitivity is a strength, it can also present unique parenting challenges. Common struggles include:
Meltdowns and Overwhelm – Sensory overload can quickly lead to emotional outbursts.
Perfectionism and Anxiety – Many HSCs hold themselves to impossibly high standards and fear failure.
Difficulty with Transitions – Unexpected changes or new experiences can be extremely stressful.
Feeling Misunderstood – Because they experience the world so intensely, they may feel isolated or different from their peers.
Supporting Your Highly Sensitive Child
Understanding your child's unique needs is the first step in helping them thrive. Here are some strategies that have worked for us:
Create a Sensory-Friendly Environment
Minimize unnecessary noise, allow for soft lighting, and provide comfortable clothing that doesn’t irritate their skin. Recognize what sensory inputs overwhelm them and adjust accordingly.
Validate Their Emotions
Rather than telling them they’re “too sensitive” or “overreacting,” acknowledge their feelings. Phrases like, “I see that you’re feeling really overwhelmed right now. Let’s take a break,” can help them feel understood.
Teach Emotional Regulation Tools
Breathing exercises, mindfulness activities, and calming routines can help your child learn to navigate their emotions in a healthy way.
Prepare for Transitions
Give plenty of warning before changes occur. Use visual schedules or social stories to help them anticipate what’s coming next.
Encourage Strengths
HSCs are often creative, deeply thoughtful, and highly empathetic. Nurture these qualities and help them see their sensitivity as a superpower rather than a limitation.
Parenting as a Highly Sensitive Parent
Discovering my own high sensitivity added another layer to my parenting journey. It helped me recognize why I sometimes felt so overwhelmed or drained by the constant demands of motherhood. If you’re also a highly sensitive parent, here are some things to keep in mind:
Prioritize self-care – You can’t pour from an empty cup. Make time for quiet, rest, and activities that restore you.
Set boundaries – Recognize your own sensory limits and communicate them to your family.
Practice self-compassion – Parenting a highly sensitive child is rewarding but demanding. Give yourself grace on the hard days.
Raising a highly sensitive child is not always easy, but it is an incredible journey of growth, connection, and understanding. By embracing their unique needs and supporting them with patience and love, we can help them navigate the world with confidence. And along the way, we might just discover more about ourselves than we ever expected.
Reflection Questions
Does your child show signs of being highly sensitive? How do you notice it manifest in their daily life?
What challenges have you faced in parenting a highly sensitive child?
How can you adjust your home environment or parenting approach to better support your child’s needs?
Additional Resources
Podcast: The Gentle Parenting Show
Website: Highly Sensitive Refuge
Website: The Highly Sensitive Person
Yvette is a psychotherapist, Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), and Certified Mental Health and Nutrition Clinical Specialist (CMNCS) who takes a holistic, neuroscience-based approach to mental health. She believes in empowering individuals to understand their emotions, behaviors, and well-being through a combination of psychology, nutrition, and sustainable health habits. Through her counseling practice, Traveling Light Counseling, she provides concierge mental health services for neurodiverse individuals, couples, and those seeking emotional growth. Looking for more support? Learn more at Traveling Light Counseling.